first i have to know

you know , i have so much things to say but i don t seem to have the time now .
but somehow, i dunno how to start, maybe i am just not in the mood to go through that whole long winded story again.

anyway, i will be going taiwan tomorrow for a whole week and coming back on friday.

at the rate i am reflecting, i think i can get insomia.

will miss you guys.
sorry if i miss out anything important.

who's that girl?



this is paperkukujiao.
the skinny ass freak.
she thinks i like M
i think she like james
but i don t like M anymore
but i still claims she like james.

listen to me .
don t listen to her.

rope me in




you know , i really miss my brother man.
i missed telling him how's shitty my day is
or shouting to him about other irritating stuff.

although there were some times we fought till we cried
until mommy almost had a heart attack,
i still miss him like shit.
and when it is time for him to go back to australia,
i won t fail to drop a tear.

i will always sleep with my light on
so he would come to my room and off it
because i don t like offing my light
when i am alone in my room.

and we always help each other in ps2 games
with statistic or warning about the low health bar.
god. korkor.

this year, i am missing out on your birthday again.
sickening. D:

don t think your finished yet.

whoo hoo. yvonne treated peipei and i lunch! :D



went down to watch the match between sgs and northland.
sgs lost to northland , 1-3. at least it is not that thrash badly.
took charge of the table for a while and one referee, silas, really pissed me off badly.

he thinks so highly of himself man and even tried to talk japson into it . i mean i am already not into people who suck up to other and here is a referee telling me who i should vote for and not caring less about my opinions and in the end i gave him a clear " whatever" to end his conversation with him.

i didn t ask him to show off about his slapshot or whatever shots he think he is so great of . and worse , he talks down of my favourite stick which is a salming? saying it is cheap and not durable which the hidden meaning is , i can afford a better one , i don t like low down stuff and clearly, can t you see, i am rich! and he told japson that he could blow the end whistle when clearly silas isn t refereeing anymore.

when he ask japson if he is sick cause he didn t want to contact any of those disease, i just clearly said it in a pissed tone like can-you-get-lost-now.

" why don t you give japson your whistle instead, since your so rich? you can afford those expensive sticks right? "

sucker. that sentence really shut him up.
japson also another idoit, keep asking silas questions that allows him to show off.
basket.




peipei, yvonne and i went to j8 to watch MR.bean's holiday and we bought one big tin of popcorn and i kept laughing super hard because peipei don t think we could finish it and yvonne can t help to agree with me or peipei whether we can finish the popcorn or not and hey, in the end we did okay!

oh yeah. i got the photos from peipei's blog. the paperkukujiao one :D
i still owe her a zap and she knows that and she is scared. :}
gosh, the feeling is good okay!

funny moments

huay yi : Hi , we are calling from the chao sia company and we would like to recruit you

wee kiat : what company?

huay yi: chao sia company

wee kiat: -put down the phone-

deborah and i : LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL.

omg. i think deborah and i love suaning wee kiat.
who ask him to be an arse! :D




we were evil since young man! :)

gleeful post

today seemed like a dream.
like everybody is happy , no scornful-looking face , nothing negative. Even though we just watched a movie today, just watching a movie and having a dinner with all smiles, i feel like today sounded so perfect. it's just that my brother ain t here. mommy always say on these happy days like this, the wind will change like somehow, we have to prepare for the worst because bubbles don t last.

i actually bought a bracelet today to remind myself of this day
a day that i actually enjoyed family time and the day that i am 17 but i watched 300.
god so corny. i think i am getting rebellious now days like i don t give a dam about rules anymore, all i know if no one get hurt, i am fine with that. :D

whoohoo. i finally got photoshop! :D
i can do so much more designing things now.
thanks tai huay wen.

btw, i said to pei pei, i shall link her as ' paperkukujiao ' in my blog and she said if i do , she will talk to M because she is in the same poly as him. There are the pro and cons but guess what, i am gonna link her as paper kukujiao partner anyway :D i want to see how she talk to him. we are both so 'ga rang '

peipei` - eat well, stay fit, die anyway (: says:
ohhhh...we're still frens.. and i'll see him during training anyways.. why? scared i snatch him away frm u arh?? dun worry,i will not.. i'll matchmake instead

see see!
dam it .
this type of friend also have man.

i aint trying to make it hard

THOUGHTS

sometimes in life, you make promises, goals and aims for yourself, however should we place them first in our urgent list or the word 'priorites'. everyone needs a target in life or a dream to acheive but can we really forgo them when something personal cropped up when your nearly , just an inch away from achieving those aims you been desiring for? honestly, life is really all about choices and it is whether you make the right one or the wrong one.

no one likes making the wrong choice in life cause the sufferings they have to go through but nobody ever thought about the lesson learnt and all they know is complaining about this and that and never giving a thought about reflecting. In the end, they will still make the same mistakes and the cycle goes on.

human beings are really funny creatures mentally. they never really know what they want until they lost it forever and then cry for it to come back. why is it humans can t appreciate it when that person is right beside you and not taking it for granted. Why is it when the person right beside you love you very much but all you can do is just " yeah yeah ok whatever " but wails and scream when that person is gone and never coming back.

the word 'sorry' NEVER change a thing, problems may be solve but they will never be forgotten. why can t they do some actions to show they are remorseful or regretful instead of just standing there apolegizing and expecting the whole world to shower pity on them and then everyone is happy again. 'sorry' is just a word, stop thinking that it is a magic word.
it is like saying " i love you" all the time yet you cheat on your lover, i rather prefer a mute boyfriend who does romantic things to keep my smile on my face always.

why is it that some people can like all kind of weird colours but they still can be racist because of their skin colour? just because of a skin colour,there's conflict and a war is started. it is so stupid when you think about it. humans are so contradicting yet they never realise it.

i know nobody is perfect then why do some people act like a total shithole ?

-

A NICE NICE FRIEND!

WRONG PAPER :D
thanks for the counter html.
pei.. PAR! paper paper paper paper!

MAY THE SCIENCE BRING US TO THE FUTURE!

went to the science center with deborah, wee kiat and kwok seng.the way there was alright. ;D you just have to stop at Jurong station and you can walk from there. it was a long ride there from ang mo kio and everytime i take the red line, i am always hoping that i would see " that guy" again but the chances are like one in a million. ahh, i need a miracle!

anyway while walking to the science center, wee kiat suddenly screamed then when i turned around, i saw him avoiding the tree branch. i was shocked, like wondering what happened because this is the first time i heard wee kiat scream. okay la, this is quite bad, i coudln t take it and sat at the side of the pavement and laughed like mad.

the branch was hanging quite low like at head level and at the end of the branch, there is this green lil bud growing out of it so the branch is crooked at the end and he thought it was one fat caterpillar like hanging in the air or something want to hook him. freakin hilarious. i am still laughing about it .

we went to watch the imax theatre about the human body. not bad. if people do not have a single clue about biology, it is quite confusing. next, we started exploring the whole of the science center and stupid wee kiat kept hiding in dark corners to scare deborah and i . there was one time he was waiting for me to come but i took such a long time , he gave up. HAHAHA. stupid fool.

about closing time, we were still stuck in the discovery zone, looking at all the mechanics. there was one where though the hole was curve like a cresent , a straight rod can still go in smoothly because it is slanted to a center angle.

then kwok seng, a super smart ass, said " hey look, i am going to smash this thing!" like he want to swing the rod hard through the curve hole and bluffing the whole world he is going to smash it . Then i seriously dunno what happened, he turn at the wrong angle, the rod actually hit the board instead of going through the hole and there was a loud BAM BAM BAM BAM sound and kwok seng's mouth was one big 'O'. Deborah, Wee kiat and i laughed until there no end.

we ate KFC for dinner and we started spitting ice at each other and wee kiat spit a tissue paper ball at deborah's lips. disgusting fellow.

we took photos but i am waiting for deborah to send it to me. my phone had no battery today. will upload it once i get it ! :D

yes, i can lose the calories tomorrow at tp!
joy man! but the journey there is like bonkers.

btw, pei pei, i am too smart for you to understand me! :D
kidding (: who ask you ):

hana kimi



this show is pretty funny, i just started watching because of tai huay wen and tai huay yi. they are so crazy over wu zun but i am more for jiro, my chicken meat! :D
our parents were too busy talking then we decided to have some fun :D

FIRST ATTEMPT



ok. this picture not bad. but huay wen never tell me to look at her.
so we took again.

SECOND ATTEMPT



i dunno why, i never look at huay wen again! >:{
so we tried again.


THIRD ATTEMPT



suddenly when i look at huay wen 's big 'O' mouth, i coudln t help it and tried to control myself from laughing .
failed again, another shot then.

FOURTH ATTEMPT



huay wen suddenly started laughing and if you can see, i am trying to control myself again. finally, we decided to change roles , maybe it would be better.

FIFTH ATTEMPT



if you look on your left, you will see a zombie instead of wu zun's look alike. then i suggest changing roles again, that means this time i play ella, the girl in the middle.

SIXTH ATTEMPT



if your wondering where am i , i was sitting on the floor laughin my arse off like mad. i coudln t open my mouth and look shocked in front of the camera when 2 people are pointing at me .
forget it , let's try one last time.

SEVENTH ATTEMPT



i look like cookie monster in there ):
i think the first shot is the best lor.

sigh, so hard.
tomorrow must go for medical check up!
take x- ray ! :D

i am so shy now (:

actually you will know when the person really have a liking for you when he make you feel good even though you have a bad hair day or you wore a stupid fusion of colourful clothes or worse, a big pimple on your face. he doesn t care how your outer looks, and if you look really good, that is a bonus for him :D not an advantage for us girls to get those boys.

i was in the MRT heading towards Ang Mo Kio and i was facing a group of boys. Somehow, i just find this guy in blue was outstanding among the rest. Though the train was a lil on the crowded side, i saw him eyeing on me and it made my heart beating like shit. For a moment , i thought it was just me until something dam funny happened.

one of his friends were playing a handphone game and he had this feeling somebody was looking at him and when he looked up, there was this fifty plus man who keep peering down on him to see what game he was playing. Then the friend was quite shocked and the rest realised and started laughing. I coudln t help it then i laughed also but i controlled it la, i looked away and laughed cause even though they are laughing , the uncle still looked at him?

then when i turned back and look at the guy in blue, he was laughing, smiling at me . Then i cannot help it , i smile back :D later when i walked out of the train, i turned around and see one last time, i realised he also turned and look at me. OMG. make me smile like an idoit lor ):

sometimes in times like this, i wished i could just pause the time and kiss him on the cheek :D omg. so bian tai. sandy surely say me , what i only like looks and sheet. she talk so much but she like wu zun and wu zun don even know she exist. HAHA.

i dunno why, ever since daryl, i tend to have a liking for guys who have a matured look now. BUT THAT GUY IN BLUE MADE ME FEEL SO BEAUTIFUL ! if there fate, i want to see him again! :D

*

went to highlight my hair and it looks like orange streak.
bought a white PMK shirt and deborah and i are on the quest to find a nice pencilbox but we are always distracted by other stuff. dam it , girls shall be girls. Nothing is ever enough when it comes to shopping. we almost bought this big purse to act as our pencilbox but i scared after i buy, i don t dare to put on my table. HAHA. so funny.

better sleep early today. i am always late for training at TP.

to lie here with you, is bliss



i am on the school banner! :D i was helping the old folks and talking to them lor. so cool :D one big face there! then mr.wee super mean, he pretend to put his baby finger and dig " my nose ". i was like laughing , can you do it when i am not beside you? so pervert one.

went to serangoon garden for lunch at cafe cartel with pei pei and yvonne. the service there sucks now. they don t want to serve people that are younger than them. All of us ate creamy pasta and pei pei and i almost vomitted. so funny. we walked to sgs later and gloria and kelly had to do push-up because they say hi to us during training. :}

i wonder what was that smile for.

saw fariza and my club members and we formed 2 lines and we thrashed the B girls like crazy (21-2)-thumbs up-. i never felt so shuang before (: normally is people thrashed me. i was shocked that Emily actually asked us to nudge and irritate them like crazy to make them frustrated.

I SAW PEIPEI TOOK PHOTO WITH MR. OEI! i bet when he pin her face up, he surely enlarge her face dam big (: i let him take a picture of me cause he is supposed to put "BEST PARAMOUNT PLAYER " at the bottom of the photo. shuang ! (:

because the B girls had camp, the teacher ordered pizzas for them. wah lau, mr wee said mr wong spoilt 4E3 and in the end mr. wee also spoil them, buy pizza. hypocrite.
but i didn t open my mouth cause i wanted the pizza (:

this week, i played floorball 3 times and i am enjoying it :D

really, who am i ?

i realise how immature my seconday school was after joining temasek poly and all that while i thought , since we are teen, we are mature enough but i am seriously wrong. i never knew there were so much of this type of relationship until i spoke to elvi and i am also shocked to find out she was between both?

at first, i didn t really get it when pris said " haha, i am confused " when cheryl and the rest kept pestering who she like and all. But after hearing them talk for a while, i got a shocked? because pris didn t look like it and she wouldn t say who it was but, really, she might have a crush on a boy.. or a girl. it is like, you dunno whether you want to be a butch.. to like a girl or to be a girl and like a boy.

it is so obvious how i been completely oblivious to this type of situation because i just coudln t get used to that fact. And to think those rebellious kids in my school " knows-it-all" ? but when elvi explain to me this type of "special relationship" , i realise that who are we to discriminate these people. it is so complicated.

pris and elvi said that actually people do this because of their friends and peer pressure and confused who you actually are and also a trend. and omg, they are so open about this. i really never felt so awkward and most of the girls in floorball aren t straight. But they don t do things to make you uncomfortable or want your attention which is good.

i like guys i like guys i like guys i like guys (x infinity )
i really hopes it stays that way because i don t want to be in a situation where it ends up shocking my parents and myself.

btw,
HAPPY BIRTHDAY CHAO SIA BEAR!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY ELVI !

btw, i like playing floorball in tp !
it rocks because people there don t kiss up, don t show off (maybe a lil) but they always laugh it off, never act big, great team spirit and everybody is willing do something for the committee like woah, such a big difference from SGS la .

see, it is always the attitude, it is not because you don t like the game, it is because it is WHO that is in it.

you always hurt me in the way you don t seem to feel it



when you play those strings,
they are just not notes,
they are more than that.

it feels like forever!

deborah, huay wen, huay yi and ryan came to my house today! we were lazing around , playing the guitar and they were looking at some of my pictures while waiting for my mother to sew finish ryan's pants before we go to Pierce Resevoir.

we flew kites and played frisbee. the place was quite crowded so like the past, we could find a parking lot easily. we saw monkeys on the way there and i don t really like the look of the monkey's face, feel like punching it. haha. huay wen said monkeys and humans are the only mammals that need to be taught on how to swim.

today wasn t really that windy but deborah and i could at least made the kite fly for 5 minutes :D



it is a goldfish :D

later we went to eat at dino. i think my dinner sucks but i like my mango ring slice :D



we wanted to display the " i-want-to-fart " face. so next time if you see deborah smiling, you know what is gonna happen.

you've been warn.

make love come alike again

today was a uber tiring day! woke up early in the morning to go temasek poly for floorball training. i was a lil late so i had to run three laps around the tracks alone. stupid lisa's boyfriend kept making fun of me but he kept me company. i like how i didn t stop at all to walk. :D i thought after all the slacking, i might get a cardiac arrest and just drop dead during the run.

i got to know a lot of girls in the training. i can t wait for next wednesday , but i dread the travelling there in the morning D: i must increase my stamina. i just realise i got cheat 30 bucks for my new stick!

*

sometimes i find it is so hard to be yourself but being yourself is good cause it is where your the most comfortable. i dunno why what makes me talk to him yesterday. luckily huay wen was there to give me moral support. HAHA. i guess i realise i still have something for him. hmm. but it is better to let the taste linger than to swallow it completely without savouring.

love signals

i talked to goat kiss today :D

and i am happy that i finally have the courage to click on him.
the conversation was much better than the before, maybe because i was myself during that time . i guess that what's work. :D

i am happy :D
dam it

but i keep coming back for more

SUNDAY :D

went to church in the morning and a lot of people cried today and i dunno what is the reason why? i asked wee kiat but he said he dunno. sometimes i wonder if i am ready for this responsibilty.

school 'e' fetched wee kiat to east wood and deborah and i kept making fun of him. we were supposed to play badminton at tampines sports hall but deborah coudln t because of her heels. we ate strudels for lunch and i finally ate a home-made meal for dinner at E's house! stayed over night deborah's house. btw, did you guys watched Ugly Betty? so funny. my mother is funnier. She asked me if i watched ugly pretty . then i was like MOMMY!

TODAY!

was suppose to go watch movie with ah kim but Music& lyrics haven t come out yet so we postpone it another day. then we went to cinneleisure to watch pursuit of happiness with sufen. so sexy leh she :D wear sleeveless shirt! ate LJS for lunch and we kept laughing at each other. man, NG YI LIN , I MISS YOU LEH. we all do :D .

then during the show ,

deborah: there are a lot of guys in the cinema.

jy: too bad, i have a ugly one beside me .

sufen: Drew Berrymore very pretty meh?

deborah : Huh? what?

sufen: if not why do guys want to see this type of show.

deborah : LOOOOOOOOL. WE ARE WATCHING PURSUIT OF HAPPINESS NOT MUSIC AND LYRICS.

so funny lor. laugh until so loud. when deborah told me , i burst out laughing.before the movie, we took neoprints and sufen said my handwriting was ugly! D: so mean, and she pointed middle finger in one picture . HAHA. so funny. deborah also.

later sufen went back early for dinner and deborah and i walked around heeren then to taka- kinokuniya. we both bought a book :D i bought ' The Book theif' i like the cover of the book, i want to use that as a tattoo :D

4 more years :}

btw, don t eat the ban mian stall at wisma atrium . had a big arguement with the chef. shet him la . take advantage of my age. dam him. really dam him. the moree i think about it , the more i feel like putting a fake cockroach in his pot of soup.

i asked for 2 bowls of $3.80ban mian and i wanted to change one of the noodles for one of the bowls and the uncle with some china slang and i coudln t understand it and in the end i said forget it , just give me 2 ban mian.
so when it was time to pay, i saw 10.50 on the register and my first reaction was wtf? then i actually asked the lady , why is it so expensive and she said

da xue mian mah!

i was shocked? i said no , ban mian and she looked at the cook and the cook gave me 2 bowls of reddish brown soup with some freak black mushroom , NOTHING LIKE BAN MIAN AT ALL. then the cook said

you ordered da xue mian!

i said no! and he said yes, and i said no again and his stupid staff helpped him and clearly i was at the losing end. and i argued with him for quite long . and now that i recalled, i actually

ARGHHHHHHHHHHH,

at the stupid cook. arsehole. $5.50 a bowl leh! the best part is i never heard of DA XUE MIAN before? like wth is that? freak! should have walked off. coudln even exchange ? and after i left, i saw him smirk? SMIRK?!

dam him. then before that, he treated one ang mor customer so nice.

i can be anything that you like.

i woke up late today and ate mommy's grand pasta and watched this show on HBO about this guy's life who have celebrel palsy ( spelling error :/) it is so sad.

later mommy and i took a bus down to nana's house and while waiting for nana to fetch us to Yi lin's house. Then while we were sitting at the bus stop, i suddenly told my mommy that we could be sworn enermies our past lives. it is because we can never get along, we are always arguing and disagreeing with each other about almost everything , like clothes especially and the will to do something . So our punishment was a recarnation of us being mother and daughter.. unfortunately. hehs!

later, our parents stopped by at a petrol station to buy drinks and snacks for us :} wah shuang!

the first picture was trying to act handsome. i was pretending to style my hair while huay wen is looking cool. then the third picture is acting like rich tai tai(s) .but apparently it looked like it failed. hehs. i really love my cousins :]

went to ah kim's house later to celebrate huay wen's 13th birthday. had laksa for dinner and then all the cousins just play around or some just sit at one corner and talk or just take pictures :D

anyhow swing one :D but so funny. huaywen, huay yi and ryan and i were laughing hard while playing table tennis because the ball was flying very high so it was something like tableminton? then ryan whacked so hard , the ball hit huay yi's head. violent.

deborah, huay yi and i were models in our past lives. ;D

deborah and i bought the pig ear rings for huay wen and huay yi! :D aren t we a pair of nice older cousin.

hmm. that is yuan yin, korkor wee's girlfriend :D

pretty hor!

okay,

rocky needs to sleep now!

nightnight!

and i love it , yeah yeah!

went to Nanyang Poly to do the visual communication direct admission interview. apparently it went well, i wasn t that pressurize as the 2 interviews before because i didn t see any students so i didn t feel the competition and the interview was in his office , not like some freak isolated enclosed area where you are the center of attention. anyway, i want to thanks nana for fetching me there :D so i don t have to wake up extra early! ;] , mooarks

went to the temple in the late afternoon to give my thanks. i really feel like in a conflict between religions here. i am attending church but my mom wants me to go to the temple. however, i don t really have the heart to tell her all this. i don t want any arguements again because i already gave her my promise and if i break that, things will heat up again , so i rather leave it as it is now, where everybody is happy. ahh well

went to bugis to walk around and my mom badly wanted to buy a new pair of sandals because our shoes were soaked! it's been rainin heavily these few days D: spoiling plans to swim. in the end, i somehow convince my mom not to buy because by the time we walked around , it is somewhat sort dry la ! hehes.

met nana, uncle tai kit , ah kim, wen and yi at takashimaya to eat dinner at some pasta shop.

PICTURES:

jy, wen and yi :D

i really like this picture ;D

huay yi and i are behind 2 glasses of water.

her face look warped while my nose look freakin swollen. D:

anyway that resturant is not bad :D i love the strawberry shortcake.

wanted to stayover wen's house but no bed. anyway, tomorrow i might be going ah kim's house :D woooh, rockrock!

huay wen's birthday is coming! i bought her a book for her birthday present! :D

woot, i am loaded! hahaha.

* * *

DEBORAH,

thank you for answering my phone call in the morning and comforting me. i really appreciate it , after what you said , i finally decided to go. thank you thank you thank you girl! even though i could tell you were busy, you still didn t hang up on me and pulled me through my stupid tears. i love you my dear girl :D

* * *

YI LIN,

never you mind what others think or see you as, just remember who you are and what you aim to be and you can be sure deborah and i , and not only that , the whole family will be behind you supporting you. if those people don t even want to give you a glance, girl , it is okay, we don t need those idoits to kill your time and your tears because in the end, they won t be doing you good. i know it is hard for my words to apply in your situation now because we are not physically there, but whatever it is , be strong at heart AND mind! we love you lots!

***

PEI PEI ,

hey girl! glad you like your birthday present! hehe, of course i have to fool you with the yvonne's admirer. anyway, you should have cried, then my money is more well spent. :D hehe, practise hard ok! then we challenge each other during interpoly match! whoo hooo!

* * *

never know it could be so wicked.

dominant household

i don t understand how family with more than one male human species survives? seriously speaking, and trying to make it easier for everybody to understand , let just visualize the male humans as a lion. Lions are very dominant creatures who claims to be the king of the jungles and what he wants, he gets it , lions doesn t even take care of his cubs, he just enjoy himself and walked off.

okay, maybe i am being sexist here, but apparently i have a stupid lion with a big ass hole in the house. all day long, he roars for all he cares, sleep for all he desire, eat for all he has greed. okay, back on what i have said , can you imagine have 2 lions in the house and one of the lion is super dominant, like he IS the king and no one can change that, what do you do? naturally, the 2 lions will fight it off and the survivor will be the winner. however, for reality, we don t use fighting to claim he's kings, rather ability .

and using that , i know who is the winner already, the lioness! because, she take care of the cubs, train them , love them whereas the lion can just simply shrug and lay in the grassland and probably have nothing better to do, except to bite the lioness and telling her how she spoilt the cubs. sorry kids, it is no more the Lion King . you have been fooled. only optimistic people would create those type of movies. i can t help it , i have never seen a good man in my life before. i am not saying womans are forever innocent , like yeah , they can be bad drivers, a pain in the ass, but who have menses for almost 40 years of her life and thinking that menses is over, menopause have arrived. menopause isn t a good thing, it is worse than pms. Also, which man ever carried about 3 kg of weight for 9 freaking months and adding to that, cutting of the vagina and then the unbearable pain of giving birth. Not forgetting , yes, have fun in sex, wooh , every night, but when the girl is pregnant, you guys just walked away.

seriously , i think the man have it good and to think they blame us woman for complaining about our life? but , woman are really dumb, despite of all this, we still fall in love with them, the world is really honestly truthfully crude.

i hate old-fashioned household, it doesn t salvage anything. it just kills people bit by bit.

went out with mr.oei, yvonne and peipei today for lunch :D

later gave peipei a floorball stick for her birthday present.

now i caught a bad cold.

" the chronicles of an arshole who won t fixed the broken cupboard"